WHY GOD NEVER GOT TENURE

         Top Ten Reasons God Never Got Tenure at any University
 
 1. He only had one major publication
 2. It was in Hebrew and had no references
 3. It wasn't published in a refereed journal and some doubt that
        He even wrote it Himself
 4. It may be true that He created the world, but what has He 
        done since then?
 5. The scientific community has had a hard time replicating 
        His results
 6. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to 
        use live subjects
 7. When one experiment went awry, He tried to cover it up by
       drowning the subjects
 8. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the book
 9. Although there were only ten requirements, most students 
       failed His tests
10. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a
       mountain top


  _^_                                                 _^_
( ___ )-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-( ___ )
 |   |                                               |   |
 |   |     Mitch Turitz, Serials Librarian           |   |
 |   |     San Francisco State University Library    |   |
 |   |     Internet: turitz@sfsu.edu                 |   |
 |   |                                               |   |
( ___ )-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-==-( ___ )
   V                                                   V
       Rule #1: Don't sweat the small stuff.
       Rule #2: It's ALL small stuff.